The Good Side of Science

It's this kind of thing that helps me to remember that, generally speaking, things are getting better.  :D

http://uk.reuters.com/news/video?videoId=102276&videoChannel=82&refresh=true

The words are coming... yay!

I've been playing my guitar a lot lately; I'm starting to feel like my frustration is lifting and I'm getting somewhere with my musical expression. It's still slow going, but it is promising :D I feel like I can maybe start to filter life's impressions into the notes, and name them properly with my words; and, ultimately, sing them straight out into the world through the air and into the hearts of everyone who matters... this is what I've always yearned for.

I was looking over my oldest poems last night... there was only one that I thought might make a good song. I had to visit my old website to view them; I posted them there thinking it was the perfect place to store them and always be able to find them; but when I tried to sign in to the site I learned that it is being discontinued... d'oh! Now I've got to transfer all that's worth keeping. When I look at the site, I think to myself, that's really not much. I'm almost tempting to leave a large part of the poetry behind, too, because it's so very dark, most of it. But then I think that no, I can't do that, 'cause even though I don't like what my life was like then, I can't deny it. For some reason, I think there's some value in remembering where you've come from; it plays such a huge part in defining who you are.

Thinking back to those times, I am so thankful for where I am now. For the choices I'm making, the things I'm accomplishing, and for the life I'm building. And especially, for the people that are a part of it. And when I think of all the things that really matter, most of the things I think of are all about those people, and me doing my best to be one of those people that really matter, too.

Lol, I think I'm rambling now. And I'm too tired to re-read what I wrote... I hope I'm making sense. Aw, man, I gotta go to bed.

Sweet Dreams :)

Another drawing

I sketched this little number when I was bored out of my mind during a training session at work. It's pretty simple, and pretty rough, but it's the first comic strip I ever drew. It makes me think of my manager, Inga. Lol. I keep it posted on my workstation wall to remind me that she's always there.

Sketches

Just for fun, here's some old pen sketches I made :)

 



This last one is an image I saw in a dream that really struck a chord deep within me... I'm not entirely sure what it means, though it feels like a symbol of this yearning I feel for change on this planet. I can't really explain it. I intend on painting it one day :)

Old Poems - 2006

1.

sleep
dreamland
why do I persist?
why do I return?
dreamland is heaven
when lucid
waking is such a let down
all they gave, all I got
was this key to paradise...
I'll hold it always.

2.

what is a dream, what is perception,
what can I gain from self-reflection -
is this all just misdirection,
tactics of lust for indiscretion..
or my brain's endless drive to ask a question?

Pretty Pretty Sky

Family

I came across these photos when I was perusing my Aunt's facebook page. They are of my grandmother Mildred, affectionately known by us kids of Gramma. When she was my age.










It's funny, when I see look at her face in this portrait, I see features that I recognize from my siblings and me; not so much my fair haired siblings as the others. Which is kinda weird, because my fair haired siblings definitely got the lionshare of their genes from her - no one else in our family has that fair appearance. 

She was so kind. I remember loving her deeply when I was a small child.. I regret we weren't as close when I was older, before she passed. It makes me want to reach out to people more; to break out and say I am Lianna, I am here, and so are you, so who are you? Mostly, I don't. I'm shy. But, I am learning. And so far, I've learned that reaching out can reap great benefits.

I guess I'll keep on, then :)  

Have you seen this yet?

Well, now, that's refreshing!

I once had the fortune to become acquainted with a delightful man named Shane. (I love that name ever since I became a fan of the L Word). He is from Ottawa (I think?) but was in Yellowknife to conduct a training session on the new all-in-one fully-integrated real-time system our department recently adopted. So, he was only here for about 3 or 4 days... but he was an absolute delight :) Very friendly, funny, flourish-y; just fabulous! 

Anyway, he mentioned in the session one day that it was his birthday the next day; but that he wasn't sad at all (to be missing it and working instead) 'cause we were such a great class (and we were). I still thought that kinda sucked though, so I decided to give him an abstract pendant-style soapstone carving I had made as an impromptu birthday gift and souvenir of his visit to the north. I think he was genuinely touched; I mean, who ever bothers to think about the fly-by-night instructor, right? And I always have been somewhat of a teacher's pet... or, do you call that a suck-up? Lol. He thanked me, then peered at me very intensely, then said he had something, a file, on his laptop that he thought I might really, really like, that he would show/share with me after class.

Isn't is awesome? I was yet again delighted when he showed it to me, and again when he emailed me the file :) He told me it was an ad run by some french fashion house ( Versace or something like that; I'm so NOT up on fashion!) in all the major newspapers He had just happened to buy a paper and see it on the first day it was ran; he scanned it right away because it thought it was something pretty extraordinary. Apparently it was, 'cause he said there was so much controversy over it that the company pulled it the next day. Talk about good karma. 

UPDATE: Okay, so not that special now that I did a search on Google and see that the image is available all over the place. And in colour, too. But, he still brought my attention to it, and that's pretty special. And, I now know that it was banned in Italy and France but it apparently doesn't piss of americans as much 'cause they've been mocking the last supper left, right, and center.  I still think it's pretty cool :)

OMG... Xylofolks!

This is freakin' awesome:

Enjoy!

On the subject of beauty....

Yellowknife has it's downsides... more and more it seems, these days. But, there are some shining upsides; for one, this little city is blessed to have some great artists residing here. One of my favorites, Helen Croft, creates works that are absolutely dazzling to view in person. I once heard it told that for the finer details in her works, she uses just a single hair from her paint brush.

I can only think of one image more pretty than what she paints... she is more pretty than anything :) 

What's in a name?

Peek a boo!

Ha ha, just kidding. My dear Natalie asked to hear more about my habit of naming all the things in my life that I love so I went around taking pictures of all my favorite little (and not so little) ones. Allow me to introduce you to:

Nefertiti

Kikowa (pronounced kee-ko-wah)

And the Windowsill Trio:

The twins:

Mandy

and Marlie 

And, don't forget Abby!

Saving the best of the plants for last, my lovely healer,

Ali

This is my lover, Indigo

And this is Piper :) She drives me where I want to go. 

Oh yeah, and this one is called Nikoli! Lol, and my girl behind him there is Dejah, though I didn't name her that - I call her brat  inspiration  :D

And, though I definitely had no part in naming her at all, I had to add these photos... can you spot who I'm talking about?

The city is beautiful, but all the beauty I see is she. 

Desiderata

After yesterday's forays into the world of frustration, I found myself reminded of the above... I have it posted it up on my bathroom door so that I'll see it often enough to (hopefully!) be mindful of it's words... If ever I have came across an instruction manual to a peacefull, happy life, this is it. 

This pic is just for fun... the leafy accent is the only decoration in my bathroom, save for the poster on the door. In this one pic, you have the three most exciting things in there. I like having green things around, real and fake; it just makes a house feel more like a home, if you ask me :)

The trials of parenthood...

8 pm 

Nikoli has decided that the battle is on. He had a terrible day at school and was sent home at about 1 pm; calmed down for a little while but then just went from 0 to 60 once we got home. I guess he figured that he shouldn't be grounded and wanted to play with his toys, and once I reminded him that was not an option all I could hear was this bell going "ding, ding!" and a baritone voice going "Let's Get Ready to RUUUMMMBLLLLLLLLE!", lol.  And I thought to myself, ok, great, here we go.  I don't know what's going on with this kid... but, to find out, I have to be patient. Very, very, very patient. Because he is testing me today, and refuses to stop. He's misbehaved so many times, the kid has lost 40 toys today. 40. I'm not kidding. 

See,  because spanking is outlawed and timeouts are ineffective, when he's misbehaving we take his toys away. 1 toy for every rule broken. And usually, it only takes one or two to get the message through, even when he's at his worst. But not today, oh no, today, the little man seems to be bent on being the boss and doing whatever he feels like no matter what the consequences. Such as telling his teacher and his principal to shut up, telling a littel girl she should be killed on the cross (I guess maybe the Easter movie made too much of an impression on him), hitting, screaming, and demanding things that he in no way is entitled to nor deserves at this point.   Give me strength.

8.45 pm

He's nothing if not determined. But very sad now that 50 of his toys are gone. 

9.15  

And even sadder now that I've told him I've cancelled his social plans for the weekend - his respite worker was gonna come over with her two kids, whom he adores. So, now he's changing his tune. Finally. 

10.27 pm  Lol, or so I thought. Turns out the boy has endurance. He finally decided to co-operate with me, and now, I've (finally!) just put him to bed. 

It's been a looooooong day. Thank God it's over!  I think I'm gonna curl up with a nice hot chocolate, my teddy, and my blanket as I watch Romeo and Juliet... or maybe Across the Universe :) And think happy, dreamy thoughts :)

Technology...

As mentioned on FB, my dependable old PC proved to be not so dependable at all and crashed yesterday, just after I got home from work. Crashed hard, as in turned itself off and would not turn on again. Ah, it was such a let down. My heart fell as I thought "what in the world am I gonna do now?". I've become so dependent on this machine, it's crazy.

Mind you, if the same thing had happened in, say, last May, I don't think it would have bothered me as much. Probably wouldn't have dipped into my savings to Go To Staples, Go Directly To Staples, and DO NOT Bother With WalMart. Lol. I'm all reconnected now, but it's gonna take a while transfer my hard drive and get access to all my old files. Sigh. If it's not one thing, it's another, eh? Heh hee, whatever. Who needs sleep anyway?

The Totally Awesome 80's

Last week our office held a "Totally Awesome 80's Potluck Lunch"  planned by our social committee (read: Connie and Michelle)... it was kinda lame (I think 80's were lame in general), but kinda fun too. Mostly just the gals dressed up for it - the guys are just too cool, I guess. I thought it would've been really neat if they had come looking like the Miami Vice guys, or MJ or Boy George; but, alas. 

Anyways, here're some pictures for ya :)

Connie, rock queen

Everyone's Fave Lady,  Raeona   

                           Me... not my best pic :(

Jackie (our leader!) - those're bra cups on her shoulders, lol. Seriously. 

Katie - I think she had the best outfit :) Check out those gloves!

And all our 80's shoes - I just love Michelle's heels/legwarmers combo :)

And, of course, the group photo...

Rock out!

I really think my outfit was horrible... I admit it, I threw it together at the last minute. But, I didn't dress that good in the real 80's anyway. I should have just worn jeans and a sweatshirt - seemed to work back then ;)  My sister did my hair (because I suck at such things), at least that turned out pretty good. I swear, I've got to plan more for these things. 

We had a great time goofing around though :D

One more from Bill...

 I so totally agree :) 

this is Nikoli (as seen by Bill Watterson)

Nikoli has actually done this. Swear on my life. Only he was Batman, or Spider Man, or Darth Vader. Or SuperBoy. 

But this never worked for me. Sigh. The boy has no fear, lol.

My Secret Identity

And now, for something more appropriate...

Did I ever tell you that K-os is one of my absolute all-time favorite artists? I have all his regular albums, and aspire to collect all the underground releases as well. Anyway, after that last performance, I thought it might be good idea to post some music that does more accurately reflect my feelings these days:

http://www.last.fm/music/k-os/_/CatDieseL

Of course, no one else can perfectly describe your feelings but you, but this has gotta be my favorite song by him, so I guess it'll do until I write my own... which I have started, but am still working on :D 

The above song is currently my favorite one by him. A close second is this one:

http://www.last.fm/music/k-os/_/Dirty+Water

..though, I just noticed the above recording is a little funny - there's a lot of overlapping sound at the start that aren't normally part of the song - someone's homemade remix? Anyway, it clears up after a few seconds and the rest of the song is normal. 

I just love how he's reviving musical hip-hop... and his revolutionary use of guitar melody in his beats. K-os rocks!

Me Too! (daydreaming)

Losing Trends - by Matthew Brown (or, "My Very First Music Video - you'll see. Windows Movie Maker Rocks!)

My dear friend Matty wrote this song a few years ago. He wrote it after breaking up with a girlfriend, and while my own situation is quite different now (yay :), I've always thought it was a beautiful song. A song doesn't have to be about me for me to sing/play it, right? That's artistic license, lol. I once told him that I found comfort in the lyrics, and thanked him for writing and sharing it. I hope I've done it justice :) 

(I had to use Movie Maker to sew two clips together - that's the blip near the end. That program rocks :) 

Easter!

Colouring eggs yesterday after our walk; I was trying to get Nikoli to pose with the eggs he made, but he insisted on laughing instead. Sigh. Kids. Just don't listen, lol. We used this kit that came complete with little bags to dye the eggs in - you just had to add a drop or two of the colouring and voila! - you can see it there on the table. Hardly any mess at all, it was great. 

Halfway through decorating the eggs, my neighbour who also happens to be a friend, sent me a text to see if I was home 'cause her and her mom had just made cupcakes. I texted back, "sweet! (pun intended :D ) come on over!" They brought over the cutest little Easter plate - actually, now that I look at the pic again, I think that's a Christmas plate, lol - complete with chocolate eggs in additon to the cupcakes. (See that gap between the cupcakes at the bottom end of the pic? That's were the cupcake that I had to eat before I could even think of taking a picture was before I took the picture. It was sooo good! And so were the other 5 that I've eaten since then, lol. It's such a shame that Nikoli doesn't like sweets... not.) How much does that so totally rock? My neighbours are awesome!

Nikoli got a hold of the camera while I was bringing the cupcakes in... you can see how happy I was about it, lol. He's quite a little photographer... upward angles suck, generally speaking, but I can't blame him; it's not his fault he's short. 

So, then we coloured some egg hunt "clue's" - little signs with arrows on them to give a kid a general idea of where to look for the eggs. Those sure were handy too, though I think they made the hunt a little too easy; we probably won't use them again next year. Though they were great for helping me remember where I hid the darn things in the first place. I like the little crayons that came with the egg-hunt kit - they're these new twistable ones made by Crayola. The colours go on really smooth, kinda like pencil crayons and not so waxy like crayons, and the twist thing is great for someone like Nikoli who can't really peel a crayon label. 

Anyways, here're our finished products:

These five were my favorites... see the bunny I drew? That's a picture of me, made by Nikoli, right next to it - the resemblance is remarkable, lol. 

And this one just sings "you are my sunshine..." lol. What a psychedelic holiday.